Hardship, mental health, and stereotypes: The uphill battle in helping others find their own way
Oscar “Oscarin” Ortega once lived on the streets of Oceanside. Today, he represents the nonprofit Lived Experiences.
Oscarin tells North County Informador that his organization “started something that I wish I’d had when I was younger.”
He grew up on Center Street in Crown Heights. “We come from an ethnic background, hardship background, a struggle background…always an uphill battle,” he tells us.
His experiences led him to where he is today. “When it first started, I was like 13, 14… having this freedom of being a kid in the wilderness of the streets…My dad had two jobs, my mom had two jobs…They loved us, but it was hard for them to be parents because they were always working.”
Having to make a lot of choices as a child, “No one ever taught me how to make a wise decision based on my future. It was always based on how can I make myself feel better and safe and happy at that moment,” he says.
“I became a perpetrator. I became a nuisance…And it wasn’t good.”
He believes his choices were rooted in traumatic events over which he had not control and that he didn’t realize he suffered from anxiety, ADHD, and depression. “I had no idea what my body was going through, my brain was going through…I was lost. I was confused…I ended up losing everything.”
Becoming a father at 22 led him to take control of his decisions. “I had to learn how to love a girl,” he said.
“That turned me to education and mental health. There’s a big piece of mental health, the brain piece, there’s a big piece of the brain that I never understood, that I understand now,” he tells us.
“It’s taken me 23 years to get to this point… being a community leader, liaison, whatever you want to call me…have a better life, other choices.”
No judgment
Oscarin tells us about the nonprofit Lived Experiences. “I think the work that we’re doing is important because it’s different,” he said.
“I like to do a lot of community work…build the trust within the community because I live in the community. And I like to use that piece to really understand what is needed in the community.”
His goal is to “fulfill the need on a very empathetic respectful, sensitive level.”
Oscarin says that the notion of what the community needs is often based on what third-party agencies believe is best. “They already labeled people like me uneducated, unresourceful, underserved, unhoused…,” he adds.
He fights to destroy that stereotype. “We’re honest people, we’re hardworking people. We’re educated…we have tons of experience. We come with great culture, traditions. We have manners. We have ethics…family-oriented.”
Oscarin explains what is different about Lived Experiences. “I want there to be a mentor, but more of a guidance…a buddy there to make sure you knew that there was some support system…I want to talk about how do we change leadership…how do we service people different?”
He also wants to teach people how to navigate the system, to make sure they know how to ask for what they need. “I wanted to make sure that people knew that they can hold someone like me responsible,” he says.
He explains, “In nonprofits, they don’t have to give me their name in order to receive something…They can walk into a building and just ask for food, and they have to give you the bag of food. They can’t say, you’ve got to fill this out before you get anything.”
His mentoring program is based on the idea that “we can just have a support system for an individual, so they can utilize us when they need us the most, wherever they need us the most, at the time they need us the most, as much as they need us the most…”
He says it is important not to judge. “We’re there to help, so that’s what we intend to do…without any judgment…I’m not trying to ‘fix’ someone. I’m just trying to guide somebody to the path… to their destiny.”
It’s okay to ask for help
“I want to make sure that people know that it’s not about me, or my story…it’s about us. There’s an us thing, there’s a we thing,” says Oscarin.
He works to make sure people get the assistance they’re looking for. “Imagine a kid who’s always been told, you’re not good enough. You’ll never get there. Your parents aren’t around. There’s not enough food. There’s no, no, no, no. Imagine a kid getting to hear, oh, yes, bro. Go for it… The self-confidence for that kid is going to go off the roof. He could ask for help. And it’s okay to ask for help.”
He believes fear is the biggest issue facing communities today. “The fear piece of it that doesn’t let us breathe. It doesn’t let us dream. It doesn’t let us walk down the street without having the fear of being removed from this city or being arrested, or fear of not being able to have a job,” he notes.
“I want people to know that it’s okay to be where you’re at right now… that you can have an open setting to say, hey, dude, I’m not feeling okay.”
He wants Lived Experiences to provide that space. “You’re still a member of society. You’re a human. You belong somewhere. And it’s my responsibility as a leader to do whatever I can…make sure that path to belonging somewhere, to something…that I create that path for the individual,” he states.
“I can’t ask for somebody to be someone who I think they should be. But if I can create that space for individuals to make sure that they know that it’s okay, that’s the goal.”
Food Distribution
Libby Lake
Every Wednesday
4– 5p.m.
504 Calle Montecito
Oceanside, CA 92057
Crown Heights
Every Thursday
4-5 p.m.
1219 Division St
Oceanside, CA 92054
Eastside Capistrano
Every Thursday
5-6 p.m.
1410 Laurel St
Oceanside, CA 92058
Lived Experiences has signed a Memorandum of Agreement with Oceanside School District to provide classrooms of food and books for the students.
